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Robbo’s Draft Review 2021
Hey there Robbo fans, welcome to Robbo’s famous draft review, 2021 edition!
Ever since Robbo’s research trip to China in January 2020 things have been going wrong. Robbo picked up a mild case of the sniffles whilst he was researching cheersquad talent one night in Beijing, and though he put it out of his mind as nothing more than a touch of yellow fever, in hindsight his subsequent wine-tasting trip to rural Italy might not have been the best idea as the Wang Chung Lung swept the globe in Robbo’s wake. Apparently the science boffins have named Robbo a “super spreader” although Robbo was already known by that name in certain establishments around Kings Cross in the 90s.
Anyway, with the disaster of 2020 in the rear-view mirror and Robbo looking to incorporate a vaccine jab in amongst the various intravenous supplements that make up the health regime prescribed by his long-time physician Dr Dank, things are looking up in 2021! Robbo has sharpened his pencil, taken the slide-rule out of its holster, and run his keen eye down the XRL rosters to prepare his draft review. Strap in Robbo fans, this one is gonna be a doozy!
As usual, please direct your hate mail to Robbo’s personal email address getfucked@gmail.com where he will attempt to locate it amongst all the sexy nudes and marriage proposals from his true fans and your mothers.
In first round draft order:
PUN - C
Nathan Cleary will carry this team if he has to, and he might need to with the last pick in each of rounds 3, 4, and 5 giving the Punters a fair bit of grief. Brimson, Tino, and one of the Braileys have been picked on potential, giving this team a boom or bust flavour. BJ is another wild card, but Bunt Cheese Tamou Kikau and Cotric should be a reliable source of points. Nothing of note later in the draft, the Punters started well, laid down some big bets, and clocked off early. High ceiling but a dangerously low floor.
Best Pick – Ben Hunt R5-64
Worst Pick – Ryan James R15-200
Too Early – Alexander Brimson R2-28
Value Pick – Viliame Kikau R9-121
Make or Break – Tino Faasuamaleaui R3-42
ROX - C
A mix of old favourites and new talent, as many loyal Rox soldiers were snapped up by other teams eager to replicate the Rox unique brand of brash mediocrity. An easy start in round 1 with superstar Pap worth the hype, then the usual Rox mix of power forwards and value backs followed. Problems started when XRL’s most valuable player Josh Aloiai caused the Rox to incur thousands in fines (as yet unpaid) and they resorted to throwing darts at the board. Good core and some decent support, but plenty of misses around them leaves this team a bit thin.
Best Pick – Phillip Sami R9-117
Worst Pick – Josh Aloiai R8-101
Too Early – Charlie Staines R7-96
Value Pick – Mitch Rein R5-59
Make or Break – Jai Arrow R6-82
WOL - A
A solid draft from a team that clearly needs to take more risks to crack the big one, this team has a very high floor but a limited ceiling. Great mix of engine and strike in the forwards, some outstanding halves, and a couple of old stagers leading a value backline, the Wolves should do well. The only question remains, where is the X factor that could lead this team to glory?
Best Pick – Joseph Tapine R6-80
Worst Pick – Corey Norman R12-158
Too Early – Jordan Riki R9-116
Value Pick – Brett Morris R8-103
Make or Break – Luciano Leilua R7-94
XIII - A
A very balanced draft from a coach who had a plan and executed well, this team avoided the traditional XRL forward rush and snapped up premium PMs and backs whilst the going was good. Still found value in the pack to support the massive strike in this team, if they get enough base out of Fish, Marty, and the Pimple, the speed merchants will carve teams up. Top contender.
Best Pick – Daniel Tupou R4-53
Worst Pick – Brent Naden R13-182
Too Early – Alex Johnston R8-104
Value Pick – Martin Taupau R6-79
Make or Break – David Nofoaluma R3-39
DRU - B
With the club owner in London and the GM in Newie, there is a multicultural flavour to both management and roster at the Druggies. Skillful draft through the opening stages but a sharp drop-off thereafter, there must have been some crackle on the line that discombobulated the intercontinental decision-making. A good core will take you far and this team has one, but other than Elliott and Saifiti not much value as the draft continued. A decent team but the upper echelons of the ladder could be out of reach.
Best Pick – Bradman Best R6-74
Worst Pick – Luke Garner R8-109
Too Early – Hudson Young R7-88
Value Pick – Adam Elliott R10-130
Make or Break – Kalyn Ponga R1-5
CBT - B
With 5 good kickers on the board this year and no mistakes in the top 5 picks, the Truckers made a smart choice with Cook the best non-kicker available. A solid pack of prime beef followed until a risky pick in round 5, with Chanel Harris-Tavita more of a hit-and-hope goalkicker option. Coach Crubbs followed a very structured draft plan to assemble a traditional forward-led XRL roster. Not even looking at a back until a reliable core was in place, the wily coach’s experience demonstrated a foolproof recipe for success that lesser teams would do well to study. There might be enough strike in this value backline to complement the rock-solid base and take this team far, but if CHT doesn’t pay off trouble won’t be far behind.
Best Pick – Corey Allan R8-99
Worst Pick – Aiden Tolman R10-138
Too Early – Dane Gagai R9-115
Value Pick – Stephen Crichton R7-98
Make or Break – Chanel Harris-Tavita R5-57
BWS - B
The Sox of Bondi had clearly prepared a similar playbook to the XIII, as a balanced draft avoided focusing too hard on any one positional group and resulted in great strike but relies on value for the base. Teddy was a good pick early with very few elite backs on offer, but in the cold light of day the rest of the Sox draft was very oriented toward potential with a number of picks taken in anticipation of a step up. Clever picks like Brooksy as a goalkicker provide some security but anything could happen with this roster. Boom or bust for Bondi in 2021.
Best Pick – Luke Brooks R5-63
Worst Pick – Aaron Woods R10-128
Too Early – Latrell Mitchell R4-50
Value Pick – Jeremy Marshall-King R7-92
Make or Break – Jamal Fogarty R2-22
LMB - F
Oh boy. With a draft methodology based on perceived penis proportion, and a coach willing to go his own way in the face of more than a decade of collective wisdom and proven strategy, the Liddle Lambs (aka the Liddle Lams aka the Swinging Richards) will either revolutionise the game, or much more likely shrink away into an impotent puddle of disappointment seeping from the orifice of broken dreams and staining the sheets of XRL forever. And they don’t even have a goalkicker.
Best Pick – Brian To’o R5-66
Worst Pick – Clinton Gutherson R1-8
Too Early – Dylan Edwards R3-35
Value Pick – Reece Robson R6-75
Make or Break – Jake Turpin R4-49
COU - B
The Old Lion still knows a few tricks, with a very good draft here despite some disagreement amongst the management team. Two shit goalkickers don’t make one good one, but the core is solid and the Cougs found value throughout the draft. Question marks remain over the strike this value backline can provide, but if SJ can recover from injury and find his form, he could lead a strong roster to glory.
Best Pick – Cameron Murray R3-34
Worst Pick – Michael Morgan R7-87
Too Early – Jarrod Croker R2-20
Value Pick – Xavier Coates R14-196
Make or Break – Shaun Johnson R6-73
MON - B
Another traditional playbook saw Coach Patches assemble a solid core before he even spared a thought for the backline, but sleeping on the GKers just a little too long leading to very iffy choice in Jamayne Isaako could let down an otherwise reliable roster. Double hooker to open the draft is a great strategy for teams in the tail end of the first round, though Andrew McCullough is an injury risk and went too early. Three great picks in the forwards gives the Monsters one of the best bases in the comp, TPJ could do anything, and Laurie should provide some strike. Question marks in the backs as Rapana’s best days are likely behind him and the Jet never really found his. Strong floor but the ceiling is probably close by.
Best Pick – Daniel Saifiti R5-70
Worst Pick – Jamayne Isaako R6-71
Too Early – Daine Laurie R8-112
Value Pick – Chad Townsend R9-120
Make or Break – Andrew McCullough R2-19
BOX - D
Great opening from the Boxes but you have to make them count in rounds 5-10 and Coach Tobes will regret a few picks in that range. Fat Turbo and Harry Grant are the base on their own, with Isaah Yeo risky under the noggin rules. Barnrat has little competition for work but could find himself on an edge, so Blake Lawrie will need to step up in the middle. Garrick is a bigger risk than the Boxes realise, but Doeuhi isn’t because we all know he’s shit. Not enough base, not enough strike, not a single good pick in the last 5 rounds, the Boxes look set for a lean year.
Best Pick – Blake Lawrie R5-60
Worst Pick – Adam Douehi R7-95
Too Early – Jahrome Hughes R8-102
Value Pick – Harry Grant R2-18
Make or Break – Reuben Garrick R6-81
GUN - C
Very unorthodox opening strategy as the Gunners surveyed the sparse landscape of second tier goalkickers and decided they’d like two of them thanks. Steadied the ship from there and balanced the positions as well as anybody with Crichton, Klok, and Turbo great picks but too much speculation in the middle and late rounds for Robbo’s liking. Plenty of strike, the questions are on the base, Turbo’s hamstring, and which middle of the road kicker to select each week. Trading Flanno could be the key and unless they can find an 8 point forward in return the Gunners look vulnerable. Probably should’ve just picked one instead of Flanno in the first place.
Best Pick – Angus Crichton R3-31
Worst Pick – Kyle Flanagan R2-17
Too Early – Ken Maumalo R6-76
Value Pick – Charnze Nicoll-Klokstad R4-45
Make or Break – Tom Trbojevic R5-65
MIN - B
The Miners focused on the base with plenty of grunt in the engine room, but a dearth of strike means Tauks goals will be key. There’s a reason the Roosters first choice goalkicker fell this far, but if it pays off the Miners could go deep. One of the Braileys is coming off an ACL and unproven as an elite PM, Fergo’s best days are behind him, and Milf goes from bad to worse each year. The Miners found great value late to balance the roster, one of the best tail ends of the draft around, so whilst it might not be exciting but they should have enough depth and base to take them far.
Best Pick – Addin Fonua-Blake R4-44
Worst Pick – Anthony Milford R8-100
Too Early – Blake Ferguson R6-83
Value Pick – Connor Watson R10-135
Make or Break – Siosiua Taukeiaho R1-13
DIN - B
Another team caught off guard by the GK rush and potentially missing out, the Dingos will rely on the sneaky Garrick mail to elevate Cherry to the elite tier. Otherwise a very strong draft all the way to the end, the Dingos maintained their focus and made good picks through every phase. Val Holmes as a GK would really elevate this team, but their strength is their base and depth. If one or two pieces fall into place, this will be a team to watch, but a lack of elite strike could leave them short of true glory.
Best Pick – Reed Mahoney R3-29
Worst Pick – Raymond Faitala-Mariner R10-131
Too Early – Reagan Campbell-Gillard R5-69
Value Pick – Kurt Mann R12-164
Make or Break – Valentine Holmes R8-111
Hey there Robbo fans, welcome to Robbo’s famous draft review, 2021 edition!
Ever since Robbo’s research trip to China in January 2020 things have been going wrong. Robbo picked up a mild case of the sniffles whilst he was researching cheersquad talent one night in Beijing, and though he put it out of his mind as nothing more than a touch of yellow fever, in hindsight his subsequent wine-tasting trip to rural Italy might not have been the best idea as the Wang Chung Lung swept the globe in Robbo’s wake. Apparently the science boffins have named Robbo a “super spreader” although Robbo was already known by that name in certain establishments around Kings Cross in the 90s.
Anyway, with the disaster of 2020 in the rear-view mirror and Robbo looking to incorporate a vaccine jab in amongst the various intravenous supplements that make up the health regime prescribed by his long-time physician Dr Dank, things are looking up in 2021! Robbo has sharpened his pencil, taken the slide-rule out of its holster, and run his keen eye down the XRL rosters to prepare his draft review. Strap in Robbo fans, this one is gonna be a doozy!
As usual, please direct your hate mail to Robbo’s personal email address getfucked@gmail.com where he will attempt to locate it amongst all the sexy nudes and marriage proposals from his true fans and your mothers.
In first round draft order:
PUN - C
Nathan Cleary will carry this team if he has to, and he might need to with the last pick in each of rounds 3, 4, and 5 giving the Punters a fair bit of grief. Brimson, Tino, and one of the Braileys have been picked on potential, giving this team a boom or bust flavour. BJ is another wild card, but Bunt Cheese Tamou Kikau and Cotric should be a reliable source of points. Nothing of note later in the draft, the Punters started well, laid down some big bets, and clocked off early. High ceiling but a dangerously low floor.
Best Pick – Ben Hunt R5-64
Worst Pick – Ryan James R15-200
Too Early – Alexander Brimson R2-28
Value Pick – Viliame Kikau R9-121
Make or Break – Tino Faasuamaleaui R3-42
ROX - C
A mix of old favourites and new talent, as many loyal Rox soldiers were snapped up by other teams eager to replicate the Rox unique brand of brash mediocrity. An easy start in round 1 with superstar Pap worth the hype, then the usual Rox mix of power forwards and value backs followed. Problems started when XRL’s most valuable player Josh Aloiai caused the Rox to incur thousands in fines (as yet unpaid) and they resorted to throwing darts at the board. Good core and some decent support, but plenty of misses around them leaves this team a bit thin.
Best Pick – Phillip Sami R9-117
Worst Pick – Josh Aloiai R8-101
Too Early – Charlie Staines R7-96
Value Pick – Mitch Rein R5-59
Make or Break – Jai Arrow R6-82
WOL - A
A solid draft from a team that clearly needs to take more risks to crack the big one, this team has a very high floor but a limited ceiling. Great mix of engine and strike in the forwards, some outstanding halves, and a couple of old stagers leading a value backline, the Wolves should do well. The only question remains, where is the X factor that could lead this team to glory?
Best Pick – Joseph Tapine R6-80
Worst Pick – Corey Norman R12-158
Too Early – Jordan Riki R9-116
Value Pick – Brett Morris R8-103
Make or Break – Luciano Leilua R7-94
XIII - A
A very balanced draft from a coach who had a plan and executed well, this team avoided the traditional XRL forward rush and snapped up premium PMs and backs whilst the going was good. Still found value in the pack to support the massive strike in this team, if they get enough base out of Fish, Marty, and the Pimple, the speed merchants will carve teams up. Top contender.
Best Pick – Daniel Tupou R4-53
Worst Pick – Brent Naden R13-182
Too Early – Alex Johnston R8-104
Value Pick – Martin Taupau R6-79
Make or Break – David Nofoaluma R3-39
DRU - B
With the club owner in London and the GM in Newie, there is a multicultural flavour to both management and roster at the Druggies. Skillful draft through the opening stages but a sharp drop-off thereafter, there must have been some crackle on the line that discombobulated the intercontinental decision-making. A good core will take you far and this team has one, but other than Elliott and Saifiti not much value as the draft continued. A decent team but the upper echelons of the ladder could be out of reach.
Best Pick – Bradman Best R6-74
Worst Pick – Luke Garner R8-109
Too Early – Hudson Young R7-88
Value Pick – Adam Elliott R10-130
Make or Break – Kalyn Ponga R1-5
CBT - B
With 5 good kickers on the board this year and no mistakes in the top 5 picks, the Truckers made a smart choice with Cook the best non-kicker available. A solid pack of prime beef followed until a risky pick in round 5, with Chanel Harris-Tavita more of a hit-and-hope goalkicker option. Coach Crubbs followed a very structured draft plan to assemble a traditional forward-led XRL roster. Not even looking at a back until a reliable core was in place, the wily coach’s experience demonstrated a foolproof recipe for success that lesser teams would do well to study. There might be enough strike in this value backline to complement the rock-solid base and take this team far, but if CHT doesn’t pay off trouble won’t be far behind.
Best Pick – Corey Allan R8-99
Worst Pick – Aiden Tolman R10-138
Too Early – Dane Gagai R9-115
Value Pick – Stephen Crichton R7-98
Make or Break – Chanel Harris-Tavita R5-57
BWS - B
The Sox of Bondi had clearly prepared a similar playbook to the XIII, as a balanced draft avoided focusing too hard on any one positional group and resulted in great strike but relies on value for the base. Teddy was a good pick early with very few elite backs on offer, but in the cold light of day the rest of the Sox draft was very oriented toward potential with a number of picks taken in anticipation of a step up. Clever picks like Brooksy as a goalkicker provide some security but anything could happen with this roster. Boom or bust for Bondi in 2021.
Best Pick – Luke Brooks R5-63
Worst Pick – Aaron Woods R10-128
Too Early – Latrell Mitchell R4-50
Value Pick – Jeremy Marshall-King R7-92
Make or Break – Jamal Fogarty R2-22
LMB - F
Oh boy. With a draft methodology based on perceived penis proportion, and a coach willing to go his own way in the face of more than a decade of collective wisdom and proven strategy, the Liddle Lambs (aka the Liddle Lams aka the Swinging Richards) will either revolutionise the game, or much more likely shrink away into an impotent puddle of disappointment seeping from the orifice of broken dreams and staining the sheets of XRL forever. And they don’t even have a goalkicker.
Best Pick – Brian To’o R5-66
Worst Pick – Clinton Gutherson R1-8
Too Early – Dylan Edwards R3-35
Value Pick – Reece Robson R6-75
Make or Break – Jake Turpin R4-49
COU - B
The Old Lion still knows a few tricks, with a very good draft here despite some disagreement amongst the management team. Two shit goalkickers don’t make one good one, but the core is solid and the Cougs found value throughout the draft. Question marks remain over the strike this value backline can provide, but if SJ can recover from injury and find his form, he could lead a strong roster to glory.
Best Pick – Cameron Murray R3-34
Worst Pick – Michael Morgan R7-87
Too Early – Jarrod Croker R2-20
Value Pick – Xavier Coates R14-196
Make or Break – Shaun Johnson R6-73
MON - B
Another traditional playbook saw Coach Patches assemble a solid core before he even spared a thought for the backline, but sleeping on the GKers just a little too long leading to very iffy choice in Jamayne Isaako could let down an otherwise reliable roster. Double hooker to open the draft is a great strategy for teams in the tail end of the first round, though Andrew McCullough is an injury risk and went too early. Three great picks in the forwards gives the Monsters one of the best bases in the comp, TPJ could do anything, and Laurie should provide some strike. Question marks in the backs as Rapana’s best days are likely behind him and the Jet never really found his. Strong floor but the ceiling is probably close by.
Best Pick – Daniel Saifiti R5-70
Worst Pick – Jamayne Isaako R6-71
Too Early – Daine Laurie R8-112
Value Pick – Chad Townsend R9-120
Make or Break – Andrew McCullough R2-19
BOX - D
Great opening from the Boxes but you have to make them count in rounds 5-10 and Coach Tobes will regret a few picks in that range. Fat Turbo and Harry Grant are the base on their own, with Isaah Yeo risky under the noggin rules. Barnrat has little competition for work but could find himself on an edge, so Blake Lawrie will need to step up in the middle. Garrick is a bigger risk than the Boxes realise, but Doeuhi isn’t because we all know he’s shit. Not enough base, not enough strike, not a single good pick in the last 5 rounds, the Boxes look set for a lean year.
Best Pick – Blake Lawrie R5-60
Worst Pick – Adam Douehi R7-95
Too Early – Jahrome Hughes R8-102
Value Pick – Harry Grant R2-18
Make or Break – Reuben Garrick R6-81
GUN - C
Very unorthodox opening strategy as the Gunners surveyed the sparse landscape of second tier goalkickers and decided they’d like two of them thanks. Steadied the ship from there and balanced the positions as well as anybody with Crichton, Klok, and Turbo great picks but too much speculation in the middle and late rounds for Robbo’s liking. Plenty of strike, the questions are on the base, Turbo’s hamstring, and which middle of the road kicker to select each week. Trading Flanno could be the key and unless they can find an 8 point forward in return the Gunners look vulnerable. Probably should’ve just picked one instead of Flanno in the first place.
Best Pick – Angus Crichton R3-31
Worst Pick – Kyle Flanagan R2-17
Too Early – Ken Maumalo R6-76
Value Pick – Charnze Nicoll-Klokstad R4-45
Make or Break – Tom Trbojevic R5-65
MIN - B
The Miners focused on the base with plenty of grunt in the engine room, but a dearth of strike means Tauks goals will be key. There’s a reason the Roosters first choice goalkicker fell this far, but if it pays off the Miners could go deep. One of the Braileys is coming off an ACL and unproven as an elite PM, Fergo’s best days are behind him, and Milf goes from bad to worse each year. The Miners found great value late to balance the roster, one of the best tail ends of the draft around, so whilst it might not be exciting but they should have enough depth and base to take them far.
Best Pick – Addin Fonua-Blake R4-44
Worst Pick – Anthony Milford R8-100
Too Early – Blake Ferguson R6-83
Value Pick – Connor Watson R10-135
Make or Break – Siosiua Taukeiaho R1-13
DIN - B
Another team caught off guard by the GK rush and potentially missing out, the Dingos will rely on the sneaky Garrick mail to elevate Cherry to the elite tier. Otherwise a very strong draft all the way to the end, the Dingos maintained their focus and made good picks through every phase. Val Holmes as a GK would really elevate this team, but their strength is their base and depth. If one or two pieces fall into place, this will be a team to watch, but a lack of elite strike could leave them short of true glory.
Best Pick – Reed Mahoney R3-29
Worst Pick – Raymond Faitala-Mariner R10-131
Too Early – Reagan Campbell-Gillard R5-69
Value Pick – Kurt Mann R12-164
Make or Break – Valentine Holmes R8-111